


The Right Decision

by Oddaudrey



Series: Half-Siblings Campaign Stories [4]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Gen, Hanahaki Disease, Juni is a super anxious boy who deserves love, We stan found family in this household
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:15:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25265203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oddaudrey/pseuds/Oddaudrey
Summary: Juniper finally leaves the monastery in search of something better, he doesn't at all expect to find a group of strangers claiming to be his family. Juniper has to battle against his intrusive thoughts in order to fully become a part of this new family.
Relationships: sibling relationships - Relationship
Series: Half-Siblings Campaign Stories [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1699720
Kudos: 2





	The Right Decision

Years of solemn silence, with no one to talk to it was easy to forget he even had a voice to begin with.

Juniper dutifully took care of the monastery as he was tasked to since before the monk’s disappearances. He cleaned, dusted, tended to the plants and animals, prayed, meditated, and did everything he could to keep his promise to the monks and also serve the honor the Ki-Rin. But loneliness weighed heavily on his mind. 

Was he destined to be alone forever? How was it that when he felt he finally found his footing in the world after the unthinkable, the unthinkable repeats itself, robbing him of everyone he cared for. If he were to take up an apprentice, would they eventually disappear as well? 

Would he even be a good teacher? He doesn’t have that much time left anyhow. 

So what should he do? If he’s gone, the whole monastery will fall apart eventually. Should he find a student? Or a cure? Or the missing monks? Or his father?

_Father._

How would he find father? He didn’t even know what the guy looked like. 

He couldn’t even use his own appearance as a reference, he resembled his mother in nearly every regard. Except his eyes…Her eyes were a brilliant sepia brown, his were a deep forest green…

Was that enough to ask around? If he found him…Would he _know?_

One last prayer for mother. 

As he knelt in the graveyard, he decided to come up with choice words to say, something simple that he didn’t have to overthink too much. 

“My…” he began to speak, then he cut himself off, he sounded _rough_ …Nothing a little practice couldn’t fix.

“My…Name is…Juniper Rhonavor.” He spoke, okay…So far so good…Where does he go from here?

“Did you…see a man…pass through this region…With green eyes.” 

“A human man…” 

He wished there was a better description to give, but that was all he had. Maybe he wouldn’t get anywhere, but at the very least he could try instead of letting himself waste away. If his fruitless plans failed him, he could at the very least try to spread word of the Lotus Sanctum to help fill it with monks once again. 

He glanced up at the mountainous ridges that overlooked the graveyard. The Ki-Rin stood on the rocks at a distance, watching him silently. Juniper bowed to them as well. 

“I hope…To be good enough for you.” He spoke his parting words, gathering his very few belongings and leaving down the same path his mother had traveled upwards many years ago. 

He passed by his old village, but he consciously kept his distance, closing to stay on one of the higher rock paths as opposed to entering the remains of the village. Some buildings still stood, but most of them had crumbled over the years. The village had turned into a large flower garden with many different species coexisting. That place was a resting place to many. 

Juniper felt his chest tighten upon looking at it for too long. He adverted his gaze and focused on the road ahead. 

He traveled on foot for a few days, he stopped by the shops of the towns he visited, reciting his practiced few sentences, and was asked to speak up nearly every time.

It was frustrating. His throat was sore and he felt like he was nowhere close to accomplishing anything he set out to do. He had condemned himself to die wandering around alone and lost. He should have just stayed at the monastery and performed his duties until he exhaled his last breath instead of foolishly wandering into a world he didn’t know. 

Was it too late to turn back? 

As he walked through a small merchant town, gathering up his courage to ask for a more direct path back to the monastery so he could avoid his old town, he heard an unfamiliar voice call out a very familiar name. 

“Juniper?”

He froze in place, his head quickly turned to the direction where the voice was coming from and he felt his stomach drop as well as his lungs clenching up. 

There stood a girl, her skin tinted blue, her finned ears poking out of her ocean wave-like curly hair. By the right was another girl with bushy blonde hair, her entire lower body was comprised of a long snake-like tail with bright jeweled scales. Next to these women was a creature Juniper had never seen before. It was hunched over and rock-like in appearance, it had horns and stone wings. The three of them stood there just a few feet away from where Juniper was. 

“Juniper Rhonavor?” The ocean girl rephrased herself, this time using his full name… _She knew his full name._

Juniper remained as still as a statue, panicked thoughts rushing through his mind. He had never expected to find himself in a situation like this, being approached by strange people he had never met before. 

“Hey-“ the snake girl attempted to speak up.

The supposed leader of the bunch, the ocean girl, took one step forward and that’s when Juniper turned his heel and ran in the opposite direction. 

“Wait! Don’t run!” The girl shouted after him. 

He lacked strong endurance so he put everything he had into getting away, fully prepared to collapse someplace safe later. He initially thought he had made good distance until he heard the sound of heavy footsteps growing closer. 

Just as Juniper turned behind him, a clawed hand grabbed at his robe and he was pulled down onto the ground.  
Standing over him was the rock creature, its heavy body sitting on top of his chest, their foreheads nearly touching. Juniper lay completely still, mortified of what the beast before him was going to do. 

The beast sniffed him all over, from his hair to his clothes, and it wagged its tail happily. 

The two other girls caught up to them, while the ocean girl pulled the creature off of him, the snake girl helped him up into a sitting position. 

“Gnog, you can’t just chase him like that.” The ocean girl lectured. 

“Gnog smells master on Juniper! Juniper is sibling!” The creature, now known as Gnog, exclaimed. 

“Hey, you were right after all, Anemone!” The snake girl said, “You’re good at this sibling hunting stuff.” 

Anemone blushed a deeper blue, “Oh, stop!” She chuckled. 

Juniper watched this exchange silent confusion. They were all related to each other, and they thought he was related to them as well? 

“Oh, Juniper, I’m sorry. I had this whole thing prepared.” Anemone apologized. She took a step back, gesturing for the other two to join her. “Hi! Hello! I’m Anemone, this is Gnog and Atlaya. We’re all half-siblings! We share a dad, Gnog is looking for dad, I found Gnog, now I’m looking for the rest of our siblings! And dad too I guess.” 

This was all way too much information, he was starting to get lightheaded. 

“You okay, kid?” Atlaya questioned.

“You…Knew my name?” He managed to ask. 

“Gnog picked up your scent awhile ago. It’s a good thing you were talking to all those locals. All I had to do was ask about you and they told us your name and what you looked like.” Anemone answered. 

Gnog grinned, very pleased with himself.

It was a hard concept to wrap his head around. Juniper had always lived a solitary life. He never had any friends, and he definitely never had any siblings before. He lived with his mother, then he lived with the monks, then he was on his own. 

But, this was something special. It was common to be reunited with lost family, especially not with siblings you never knew you had to begin with. 

Juniper lost his mother, for the longest time she was the only family he had. He never knew dad, never had the chance to make that connection with another parental figure. 

Juniper felt alienated from the blood of that man flowing through his veins. 

All the other elves teased him for his human characteristics, for being small, for being a ‘bastard.’

He had no place amongst elves, even as a monk, the others had left him behind because of who he was and thus they disappeared and he remained. He was nothing more than a ghost, both lost and stuck in place. 

Whatever invisible force possessed him to leave must have wanted him to meet these siblings, no matter how odd they might be.

“Why don’t you tell us about yourself as we keep traveling?” Anemone offered a hand.

Juniper extended his own and was swiftly pulled up with a surprising amount of strength. 

“You good with coming with us?” Atlaya inquired. 

He thought for a short moment, about the fleeting amount of time he had left, the fabled disease that has dominated his life. His anxiety was quite literally characterized with thorns and suffocation. 

Would they think twice about welcoming him if they knew that? How would he even begin to explain that he was too weak to completely overcome the illness? That it was his ‘father issues’ that have kept him in death’s strong grip for the majority of his life, just waiting for him to finally slip. 

It felt wrong not to tell them, but…But what if they rejected him? What if his issues were too much of a burden for them to carry along with them? He didn’t want to lose the first small semblance of acceptance he had gained after years of isolation. 

_They’ll figure it out eventually._

But they seem like sweet and understanding people.

_You’ll make things worse by hiding it from them._

They’re family…

They could hate him regardless of him lying to them. What happens when his time runs out? Is there any point to burdening these people, even if they’re his family, they aren’t guaranteed to love and accept him. 

What if-

“Hey kid?” Atlaya up, dragging him out of the depths of his thoughts. “You spaced out a bit there.”

Juniper turned his attention to her. Everyone was still there, they hadn’t left and they were waiting for his answer. 

“Yes.” Juniper answered, “I would like to join you.”

Anemone excitedly cheered, “Great! This is gonna be fun!” 

All four of them set off North, finally leaving the mountainous area behind. Juniper’s head felt a little strange being on lower ground for the first time in his life. He had no idea that the change in altitude would be so noticeable, he almost missed Anemone’s question for him. 

“How old are you, Juniper?” 

“Nineteen.” He answered. 

Anemone chuckled a bit in response, “So far you’re the youngest next to Gnog. At least we think Gnog is the youngest. He doesn’t really have a concept of age, but Atty and I concluded that he feels like a little sibling.”

“What did you do before this? I was a performer, Anemone did some seafaring, Gnog did…Well, Gnog mostly just stayed in one place until Anemone found him.” Atlaya added in. 

“I’m a monk,” Juniper replied. “from the Lotus Sanctum.” 

“Hey Juni- Heh, is it okay to call you Juni?” Anemone asked, “I’m planning on giving everyone a nickname!”

“Yes.” Juniper answered. 

A brief moment of silence before Anemone spoke up again, this time her tone vaguely serious but still soft. 

“You don’t like to talk much, do you?”

“No.” Juniper responded, feeling the uneasiness of guilt hovering over him. 

He was no good at this. He shouldn’t be here, he’s clearly unfit for a journey like this. He severely underestimated how reclusive and withdrawn he had become. Why did he ever think living with people again would be easy, especially with people who he deliberately wasn’t truthful to from the beginning. 

_Just say you’re sick and leave._

He didn’t want to leave, he yearned to be closer.

_You’re being a nuisance._

He could just try harder…

“It’s okay, don’t feel pressured to talk or anything…” Anemone placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Just do whatever makes you feel more comfortable, alright?” 

He could see it in her eyes. She pitied him. She was trying her best to understand him, but she couldn’t, and it was his fault. 

He should just speak up right now. 

Just shout as loudly as he can, 

_“It’s not your fault! I’m just a lowly hermit with flowers in my lungs! I’m trying my hardest to be normal but I’m not good enough!”_

“…Thank you.” He said instead. 

Anemone and Atlaya returned to idle chatter amongst themselves with little Gnog speaking up in once in a while. Juniper couldn’t even think of a single word to contribute. 

If he wanted to succeed in simple small talk he’d have to actually work for it, but here he was, not uttering a single word for the rest of their travels for the day. The sun was beginning to set and everyone had settled into one of the closest Inns. 

Anemone counted out the gold coins she placed on the reception desk. 

She turned back to her siblings, “Since there’s four of us now, I guess we’ll have to split into two rooms this time. Gnog is chill with perching himself on the edge of the bed or a window still, Juni would you like a room to yourself?” 

He was still uneasy around his siblings, feeling inadequate and insecure. But being alone sounded far more horrifying than anything. He didn’t know how to communicate these feelings. He couldn’t tell if Anemone was insinuating that he should have a room alone because she’d prefer it or she thinks it’d be best for him, and he didn’t even know what was best for him. 

His inability to answer left Anemone to make the decision herself. 

“Two rooms please!”

They were handed the room keys. The girls and Gnog left to their own rooms with Juniper being left with the lone room down the hallway. He watched them wave back at him before retreating behind the door and closing it behind them. 

Now he was alone. 

He sat down on one of the beds in this empty room, he didn’t change his clothes nor brush his hair. He simply sat down on the bed and remained there, looking down at his hands in his lap. 

His room was silent, as silent as the monastery was but far worse. There were sounds of gentle waterfalls, no singing or birds, no gentle breezes, and definitely no small talk from his siblings. There was nothing, and he was so painfully aware of how alone he was that it hurt. 

His chest tightened and burned, his lungs begged him for more air that he couldn’t give. He tried to breathe, but instead he suffocated. 

_You’re all alone…_

He didn’t want to be alone. 

Something came over him, there were no thoughts outside of fear in his mind, yet his body moved on its own. He registered that he stood up and opened the door, but he felt none of it, it was like something else was controlling him. 

The one thing he was aware of was him opening his sibling’s door and watching them look up at him from their beds, Gnog craning his neck to look at him with curiosity. 

“Juni, what’s wrong?” Anemone questioned, now pushing the blankets off of herself and walking up to him, pulling him into the room and closing the door behind him. 

Juniper felt his anxiety quell once he was reunited with his sibling. The soft light of the room, the comfort of being together as opposed to being alone. It was enough to allow him to breathe properly once more, his pain dulled. It was when he finally blinked that he realized his eyes had been welling with tears, at last released. 

“Can I sleep with you..?” he sheepishly asked. 

“Of course.” Anemone took him by the hand and brought him over to the beds. 

Atlaya scooted over to the farther end of the bed she was in, parting a section of the blankets for Juniper to crawl into. 

“I’m partly cold-blooded, so I don’t mind the company, so long as you aren’t weirded out by my tail.” Atlaya welcomed him. 

It was now that Juniper had the sense to remove his shoes and outer robes. He crawled into the bed and Atlaya tucked the blankets over him. 

Juniper felt tranquil, for the first time in many years. 

He was warm and safe, tucked under layers of soft blankets next to his older sister. He listened intently to the sounds of his sibling’s carefree chitchat. Talks of visiting a small farming town with a religious background, a forested land with a swamp, and other places that Gnog had a sixth sense about. 

His fears were not only subdued, but were completely pacified. 

Juniper fell asleep that night feeling content and calm. 

He might not have had the strength to communicate better, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t eventually learn to. He clearly made the right decision, choosing to follow this family he just discovered he had. Perhaps a happy and long life is achievable.


End file.
